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Experience Matters www.unionmemorial.org
Union Memorial Hospital

Department of Medicine

Medical Terminology 101

Here are some of the things I have either heard people say or I have seen on charts over the past couple of years. Some of these were sent to me from other parts of the hospital when they heard that I was compiling them. Thank you to all of those who contributed.

  • "unresponsive and in no distress"
  • "nonverbal, noncommunicative and offers no complaints"
  • "The need to maintain dialogue with the family regarding the appropriatenss of limiting futile care to the patient is noted"
  • "his Hct is stable but dropping"
  • "I don't want to be incubated again"
  • "coffee bean emesis" indication for a CXR
  • "increased worriation"
  • "V/Q scan was positive for low probability"
  • "pt was apprehended and guarded"
  • "pulses are fixed and dilated"
  • in asking about code status, "do you want your wife to receive artificial insemination"
  • "findings compatible with ileus. Bladder is still in colon"
  • "be sure to check eyes and nose"
  • "unemployed cashier"
  • "pt wants to live" (leaving AMA)
  • "I had a kiwi on my chest" (keloid)
  • "dictated home O2, transcribed homo too"
  • "I have hemorrhoids & the Fitzgeralds"
  • "hyperpotassemia"
  • "that bacterial virus is a doozy"
  • "noncompliant smoker"
  • "homodynamic compromise"
  • "denies any rectal breeding"
  • indication for an EGD - "stomach hurt, swallow face in the morning, her poop is black & diabetes"
  • "spucus"
  • "fireballs in the uterus"
  • "F\U chest rumbles"
  • "partial TAH"
  • "toxic screen"
  • nursing notes in the ICU - "MD @ bedside attempted to urinate"
  • "titrate Tridil to pain"
  • indication for flex sig "blood when whipping himself"
  • "chicken pops"
  • "depleted electrodes"
  • "patient's anatomy not compatible with Texas catheter"
  • "if she wants children, think about recommending birth control pills"
  • "Discharge medications. The pt will be discharged on his discharge medications "
  • "blood clogs"
  • "her chest pain started in her right leg and it went up her back"
  • "abd pain is relieved by Maalox & constipation"
  • "pt was fecally impacted @ the nursing home on April 12th"
  • "antenna lung" (atenolol)
  • "since pt is a diabetic will keep a low threshold for suspicion"
  • "accentually normal study"
  • "not uncommonly non-diagnostic"
  • "US prostate rule out hydronephrosis"
  • Ortho consult - "Recommend sling for comfort & pillows for sleeping"
  • "polynephritis"
  • "holy systolic murmur"
  • Nursing home transfer notes - "C. diff negative, VRE nonnegotiable"
  • "per the NH staph"
  • "pt expired and was dc'd home"
  • "pt has looked cachectic for the past 3 days"
  • "She diuresed pretty well. I gave her 40 of Lasix and she put out 2000 liters."
  • admitting dx="diarrhea and he won't sit up right"
  • "Harbor Tunnel Syndrome"
  • "pregnizone"
  • "My back has been hurting ever since they gave me that cauterizer." (Foley catheter)
  • discharge dx=nephrolithiasis; discharge instructions="drink plenty of urine"
  • on the top of an intern H&P; "source of information: self (poor historian)"
  • "Pt sitting on comode with family member brushing her hair"
  • SocHx (ICU admission presentation), "lives in funeral home."
  • physician order, "titrate O2 to 0%"
  • "Pt has had persistent vaginal breathing"
  • "Pt sitting up comfortably, eating her lung"
  • "I have sinus-sitis and I don't want you to give me the bacon-eggs." (Beconase)
  • "I will continue discontinuing the Lipitor."
  • "Writers Syndrome"
  • CCU Orders: "Transfuse to PCU"
  • "hyena hernia"
  • "dx-stable"
  • "left nose fracture, but his right nose is OK"
  • "admit dx "Arrhythmia situations"
  • "Mucormyst"
  • "on CBC she was hyponatremic"
  • order - "DC the Amiodarone toxicity"
  • "CME was detected in the bronch"
  • "grand mama seizures"
  • "ankeloedemia"
  • "she progressed her amputation well to where she was able to climb steps and walk 25 feet"
  • "pt appears yellowish with glasses"
  • "I need some flu serum"
  • "could be secondary to pulmonary process vs. other causes"
  • "her hematuria dissolved"
  • ortho consult - "Can you preop this guy? His ejection fracture is 30%"
  • "colonosophy"
  • blood cx - "suspicious x2 bottles"
  • "Neutrition"
  • "found on the floor in her own diarrhea" (as opposed to someone else's diarrhea)
  • "I have a home nipplizer"
  • "I see a beautician for my pressure"
  • "In the past, I perpetrated my colon"
  • "Her CHF got much better with diaphoresis"
  • "She did not lose control of her rectum"
  • Plan - "gently dehydrate"

    Links:

  • Some medical funnies
  • Medical Record Humor
  • Medical Malapropisms, Mispronunciations, & Other Strange Things


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